Do Motivation and Reality Mix?

If you can dream it, you can DO it! - Disney

Leap and the net will appear! - John Burroughs

Nothing in Life is impossible. The word itself says "I'm possible". - Audrey Hepburn

These, and a thousand more blindly positive platitudes float through our culture from well-meaning parents, teachers, preachers, speakers, and tacky posters in the hallways of companies around the world.

I'm guilty of repeating these quotes over the years - mostly to myself, in an effort to get myself going. My problem? I'm a realist. Pragmatist perhaps. Even a cynic, those close to me would say. My bigger problem? I'm a motivational speaker. Or, for those that hate that term (me among them - but it's the most general, recognizable term for the world), you can go with 'inspirational speaker' (but that offends non-spiritualists), or 'transformational speaker' (whatever that means), or even 'GIMP speaker' (which you might think is a crass term for disabled speakers like me, but actually stands for 'Great Inspirational & Motivational Presenters', or so my coach Tom told me after he came up with it).

But I digress.

I have a love/hate relationship with 'motivation'. Even though it's fairly well accepted that no one can motivate someone else, because motivation is an intrinsic force (finding a source for this is a bit of a wild google chase, but no matter), people in general tend to A. Believe they CAN motivate others, B. have a desire to be externally motivated, C. believe they aren't getting the right motivation from others, and therefore blame them for not being motivated, and/or D. complain that motivation doesn't last (which reminds me of a favorite Ziglar quote - “People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing – that's why we recommend it daily.”)

People WANT motivation. NEED motivation. SEEK OUT motivation from books and music and speakers, and depending on our psychological makeup up, from exercise, food, and even sex.

Here's the problem - the motivation so many people think they want isn't motivation at all. It's a dopamine hit. A rush of energy that we are able to harness for varying lengths of time to help us work. That's not motivation. It's a drug hit.

But, perhaps I digress again.

The question you might be asking, and that I have asked myself many times, is "If you don't believe people can be motivated by others, why do you do what you do? What is 'WinAnyway' if not a motivational message?"

Fair question.

WinAnyway, and me as the "WinAnyway Guy", is all about realistic motivation - encouragement aimed at giving my audiences the means to realistically and consistently find the motivation within themselves. I can't motivate you, but I can guide you to regularly accessing your intrinsic motivation.

It's a simple process - Review, Celebrate, Redesign, & Act. Whether you've attempted a task and failed, attempted a task and succeeded, or are simply at a resting point figuring out where to go from here - motivating yourself to move forward again takes self-examination.

Review: Where were you? How far have you come? Whether you look back years, days, or even a few hours, remembering where you started is important. Even if you've taken steps backward. Every journey comes with setbacks and victories - big and small. We have been trained to ignore the small victories if we don't experience a large one, and conversely, even if we don't suffer a large setback, we often magnify the smallest of mistakes along the way. Taking time to review and take inventory of the reality of what has happened along the way puts you in a position of clarity and strength moving forward.

Celebrate: What did you learn? What progress did you make? What have you survived? The answers to these all give you reason to celebrate, even if the world may tell you you should only celebrate your final victory. This doesn't mean you need to spend a ton of money on some extravagant event or trip - though, if that's the level of celebration your life allows, I'm the last one to stop you. My celebrations are simple, and more geared toward respite and recharging - maybe a movie, or a night out with family (or alone!), or buying that book you've put off buying because, well, you didn't really NEED that faux leather bound copy of Huckleberry Finn, but it sure would look nice on that bookshelf. These rewards preserve your self-esteem, protect you from focusing on outside negative judgments that can quickly fester as internal negative judgments, and help you build internal emotional energy (read: motivation) to move to the next step.

Redesign: After celebration, it's time to turn your attention back to your journey - back to your goal. What changes can you make in your approach? Is it simply a matter of starting over, or do you need to start differently? What resources and allies can you bring in that will help you over obstacles you've yet to overcome? Here's a big question many don't want to ask: is this still a goal you want to pursue?

The Redesign stage offers options - and one of those options is to quit. QUIT? OMG! The world hates a quitter! Still, quitting can yield bigger and better results if done with intention and thoughtfulness. Maybe you've grown beyond the goal you've been trying to reach. Perhaps you see a different goal altogether that is just as valid, or even more valuable, than what you been trying to achieve. Oftentimes, we see other options open up even as the doors to our original goal repeatedly slam shut. Quitting doesn't have to mean giving up - and really, it shouldn't. But if you quit in order to shift, you may just find your next journey goes smoother and faster - and farther.

Finally - Act. No good motivational formula is complete without a call to take action. Maybe massive action, as Tony Robbins likes to say. Maybe just a step further than you've gone before. But you've got to do something now that you have a newly designed plan, and maybe even a newly determined outcome.

The WinAnyway life isn't about false platitudes. Yes, dream. Yes, take chances and leap - after at least taking a peek. Yes, more is possible for us than we often believe. Maybe even just go all in the first time - and if you achieve your goal - GREAT. For the vast majority of the you, however, you will face failure. Unexpected challenges that stop you in your tracks. Partial success that leaves you wanting. You'll feel like a loser, and the outside world will affirm that belief.

WinAnyway was built off one question: Are you who you want to be, or who the world has let you become? Use it to build off the knowledge of where you've been, to create self-esteem through celebration, and renew your energy by redesigning your plan - and your internal motivation will be replenished and ready for your to draw upon - regardless of what the world is throwing at you. Motivation and Reality CAN mix, and you can define your OWN success...and put yourself in position to Win...Anyway.

Bring the WinAnyway message to your organization - contact Rich at Rich@RichHopkins.com,
or call 303-345-8487.